It was a dark and stormy night in Kosher Kola blog land. Hevel was forced by circumstances beyond his control to ask his favorite (only?) blog admin to, gulp, write a guest blog post about his awesomeness. Clearly, Hevel had gained access to some strong recreational drugs, but the idea for a blog post had germinated and is presented here in (something resembling) full flower.
I first met Hevel last summer in a Facebook group. He drew me like a moth to the flame by saying he was a 30 year old gay man with grown sons. I was very determined to chase down that seemingly improbable story and so I struck up a chat with him.
Poor Hevel. He responded so sweetly. So unsuspectingly. So unaware that I am the pit bull of friends, unable to let go of a story until I have ALL of the story.
In time, through skillful questioning and mind-boggling attention to detail, I wrangled some of the story from him. In an effort to lure him further in and disarm his defenses, I often volunteered to submit to his questioning about my life. It went something like this:
Hevel: “Um………..can you speak any languages other than English?”
Jill: “No.”
Hevel: long, uncomfortable Facebook chat pause
Jill: “So, tell me about…”
And on it would go. Every so often, I would volunteer choice pieces of information about my life, such as this one:
Jill: “Did I ever tell you about the time I….yada yada yada…and I accidentally gave myself the Heimlich maneuver!”
Hevel: “:)” long,uncomfortable Facebook pause
Jill: “So, tell me about…”
And on it still goes.
The funny thing is, Hevel is addictive. I know his readers and friends (most of you falling into both categories) understand this. He is gentle, kind, polite, loving, silly, funny, helpful, protective, proper (well, usually) and quite possibly the most wonderful friend around. Despite my vignettes, he really is the most remarkable and sensitive listener, insightful beyond his years, with a huge heart and enormous capacity for empathy. He has been a daily gift to me. And not just because he introduced me to the beauty and music of Harel Skaat.
So, Kosher Kola readers, what did I leave out? What are the Joys of Hevel to you?
(Oh, and he really asked me to write a post about my upcoming mission trip to China. So…I’m going on a mission trip with my teenaged daughter who was adopted from China. We will be working the day shift in the special needs floor of an orphanage so the regular workers can go home for Chinese New Year. Personally, I think my blog post idea was much, much better, but what do I know?)
i have just discovered the joy that is Hevel. i too find him addictive and look forward to chatitng with him daily. he is a treasure that i am glad i found
I LOVE Hevel as my son.
He is a sweetheart.
We have had many discussions, always enlightening.
Hm, did you write that before you read my most recent comment on your blog? :-/
No. I read it after! LOL
Love does not withdrawl due to disagreement!
In my experience love is withdrawn over lesser things.
In my experience too… That is why REAL LOVE is so important to understand.
TRUE love is unconditional and does not expect anything in return.
It is a gift.
A MOTHER should love unconditionally. I know that many do not. That was not my experience
growing up. But I want it to be my children’s experience.
I want them to understand true love.
Christie recently posted..THE STRUGGLE a BCLC MOMENT
Love what you’ve written, Christie. So true. I also appreciate your blog…Hevel got me to following you. I won’t say where I live here, but…we are not so far apart.
Azt hiszem sok fájdalomcsillapítót kaptál!
Szeretlek!!!
Én soha nem tagadtam, hogy a rabod vagyok, mások nem tudom, hogy vannak vele.
Csupán csak azért, mert úgy mindenestől imádom a kis tökéletlen-tökéletes lényedet.
cupp!
Andi recently posted..Szolgálati közlemény
What I like most about Hevel is that he is a true gentleman (well, he is online, so I guess he is IRL too). Though our lives, our opinions, our countries, our religions … practically everything are very different, his posts always hit home for me.
Ciska recently posted..Protected: Paswoord = naam baby!
Aww, thank you. Just letting you know that if someone subscribes to your blog on WordPress, they can see the photo on their Reading page. Very cute baby.
That’s because I messed up at first and posted it as public … The password was added about 17 seconds later when I realised my mistake, but alas, it was too late! He’s even cuter IRL and is out off the incubater and free of all wires as of an hour ago.
))
Ciska recently posted..Protected: Paswoord = naam baby!
Yay! Congratulations!
Yes, Hevel and I are very different from each other, as well. He definitely hits a sweet spot in lots of hearts, doesn’t he?
Hevel and I are as different as can be. (I am a 27 year old straight woman with no kids from Canada!) I stumbled upon his blog completely by accident, yet I continue to be drawn back here to read.
He’s honest, upfront and unapologetic about his own opinions and thoughts. I like that about him. And i’ve learned a lot about Israel and Harel Skaat!
Keep being you Hevel!
I keep coming back because I enjoy the blog. More importantly though, I keep coming back because in a strange way it’s a comfort to me to know that my 19 year old gay son who is in the process of converting to Judaism is going to be ok in this world that can sometimes be filled with hate and discrimination.
Whenever I start to worry, this is the first place that I log onto to read the beautiful Open Letter to Parents of Gay Youth.
I can only hope that my son will have the confidence in his lifestyle that Hevel does.
Please keep posting! Reading your blog is my form of therapy.
Lorie
I started writing the reasons why I very much appreciate reading what Hevel writes. But I couldn’t express properly what I really meant – oh, the joys of not being able to use my mother tongue!
In some ways I guess Hevel and I are very different. In many of our opinions though, at least the ones Hevel expresses on this blog, we are very much alike.
Hmmm, I would be interested even in Swedish.
När jag läser din blogg, får jag uppfattningen att du är en genuint snäll person, varmhjärtad, öppen och kärleksfull. Trots att du blivit olyckligt tilltufsad av livet har du kvar en tillit till människan och du förmedlar åsikten att alla människor har samma värde, oavsett religion, kön, etnicitet eller sexuell läggning. Du förmedlar också att du tror på att varje människa enbart kan styra sina egna handlingar och att varje människa har rätt att göra sina egna livsval, grundade i den egna övertygelsen, oavsett andra människors tro på vad en eller annan religiös skrift förespråkar. Allt detta är åsikter och uppfattningar som jag till 100% instämmer i och själv gör mitt bästa att leva efter. Dessutom skriver du med stor och innerlig humor, ofta en som jag uppfattar det brittiskt torr understatement-humor
, oavsett om det handlar om din egen älskade familj, världspolitik eller religion.
Det är svårt att bilda sig en korrekt bild av någon utifrån vad personen ifråga skriver, men de aspekter av dig själv som du delar med dig av gör att jag bara kan beklaga att våra länder ligger så långt ifrån varandra! Jag skulle ha tyckt mycket om att få prata med dig i verkliga livet!
Now, who will translate for you? Please not Google Translate!
Kevin always says that my humour calls for a cup of tea with milk, no sugar.
And scones.
I was going to post a 7 Quick Takes today with 5 rants about the Roman Catholic Church, catholics in general and the pope, but then I decided that it’s my opinion and as such I should keep it for myself. Though there might be another post about the Israeli elections, with more of the cute Mr. Skaat talking politics on stage as well. He did that after the polls closed, btw.
BTW, one of my sisters was a Scandinavian studies major, and while her concentration was Norwegian, she speaks Swedish just fine and can get by in Danish and Icelandic. She is also a Eurovision fan, even bigger fan than I am! She got to go to Oslo as an interpreter in 2010 and this spring she will be in Malmö with a group of American ESC enthusiasts. So I have a source for Swedish translations.
…and now off to watch Wallander after this comment put me in the mood for some British Swedish goodies (filmed in Latvia).
I’m really happy that you had a good translator on hand
! Impressive! But then again I’m not that surprised, since you seem to have a family bigger than anyone else, covering every possible skill on earth 
. I guess that explains a lot about why your view of the world isn’t as narrow as that of many people.
Malmö – that’s rather close to where I live. We see the posters about the Eurovision everywhere in town when we go there. I’ll think about your sister when I see the posters next time!
I honestly thought Wallander was filmed on location, but maybe that’s some older version.
I like tea with milk. A colleague I once had, from Turkey, commented on my cup of tea, with the one single word “English”. Scones are good too. But we bake ours on rye. A touch of Scandinavia
I don’t know why I always miss the correct “reply”. My comments never align below yours the way they should!
Apparently most people don’t use that button. I just want to make sure that you get my response.
Wallander was filmed on location. And Riga is part of the the locations.
I just had a brain freeze and typed Denmark at first! Actually the BBC series and the Swedish film were shot about 40 m apart at one point! I really want to see the Swedish version. Actually, I should read the books.
A few friends and I plan to do a Eurovision watch in at IKEA. Just go, sit down at the living room area and watch the second semi final on our phones.
I hope they won’t kick us out. 
Maybe we’ll have dinner there before the show. 
Such a fun idea, to watch the semi finals at IKEA! I can just imagine you and your friends sitting there
. Unless you start jumping I don’t think they would throw you out. However, unless your IKEA has more generous opening hours than IKEA here, you might run into a problem since both the semi finals and the final are usually broadcasted pretty late. You’ll have to hide beneath the cushions 
I haven’t read the Wallander books, nor have I read any of all the other Swedish thrillers…. It’s not really my preferred kind of literature. May I suggest you read something better?
Have you watched the European Figureskating Championships? Mens’ short was yesterday and our whole family spent the afternoon in front of the tv. That’s a rare sight; only happens now and in March, when it’s the World Championships! We’ll continue cheering for our female skater (or maybe both of the sisters, can’t remember) today and then both/all of them on Saturday.
On Thursdays IKEAs are open till midnight here. They close around noon on Friday and don’t open till past 6 p.m. on Saturday. So we should be fine with the semifinal, which starts at 10 my time.
Sure, you can recommend better books. I am just a big fan of light reading in addition to some more serious stuff.
I haven1t watched the Europeans yet. I’d really liek to catch the men’s long program and the pairs.
Aha! Such generous opening hours! Lucky you! Here they close at eight. Then you’ll be able to enjoy the semifinals there. Such fun
I actually didn’t have any specific books in mind. I just thought that the Swedish thrillers arent’ quite as good as people say
But I fully agree with you that some lighter reading is needed, sandwiched in thicker or thinner layers in between more serious stuff.
Mens’ long program should be tomorrow. I don’t know if it’s in the afternoon or late evening though. Sorry!
Actually I do like Swedish thrillers a lot! And other European thrillers and mysteries. There is something about them that I just enjoy. I’m pretty pissed off though that ebooks are now so expensive. There is a Wallander book with 5 short stories that I really want to get.
Days are longer here in the winter and our life rhythm is just different. Plus we have that super early closing on Fridays, and all of two IKEAs for the whole country.
I work too many hours to really enjoy the joys of Hevel….I am a sometimes reader. I was drawn in because of the contradictions, stayed around and visit for the honesty and empathy. Good music. Great food cooking is great for ideas- meatloaf cupcakes! To check if he will remember to wear his red pants more often? Love his streak of fun! Anyway you can easily tell, he’s a good person, friend, dad……how does he coordinate all those kids, to say nothing of all those kids’ phones! He obviously deals well with logistics! He reminds me, in a way, of my friend Ora. He’s a good soul. I was thinking recently if I went to Israel I would want to stop by and say hey!
I don’t coordinate all those kids too well. I keep track of everything in a gigantic Excel file, with more sheets than I care to admit, and by using the kids’ phones to set up reminders for them. I think when they enter the work force Outlook reminders will be absolutely normal for them.
I have known the Joy of Hevel for many years now.
You have described him so perfectly.
I would had that he is a super friend in that I have been a poor friend as of late, not keeping up with him, but he continues to be a great friend.
Hugs…..
Awww, thank you, Jon. It’s always good to see you around here or Facebook…
I will try harder.