Mad World


The Cisplatin was quietly dripping and I was dozing off.

At 10:31 a.m. I figured out that taking shelter being hooked up to IV is quite difficult.

At 1:30 p.m. I was begging the nurse to let me go to the reception area, so I could spend some time with my middle kids. Sitting on a long bench together, listening to them talk about their day, missing Kevin, missing me, and my heart about broke when one of my 9-year-olds stated very matter-of-factly that in case their school got hit, their light wood desks would offer no protection. And he is right. The only sturdy enough tables are in the cafeteria, in a different building from their classroom, and the cafeteria only seats 1/3 of the school population anyway.

It hurts when my children realize that. It also hurts when they say that they are scared, but that they consider themselves lucky they don’t have to live with this like children in the South do.

And while I have the option to leave this country, there are many Israelis, who don’t have it… and it’s something I don’t want to do. This is my home.

17 Responses to “Mad World”

  1. Boz贸t says:

    I think I would leave…or at least send the kids away.

    I hope you’ll all be fine and I’m trying hard to believe there can be peace in that area….

  2. Ciska says:

    Please stay safe …

  3. De says:

    Praying for the safety of you, your family and your extended friends, neighbors and family. I have missed reading your blog. For some reason I just could not get it to load. Glad to be able to catch up some today.

    De recently posted..Mamma’s Vacation!My Profile

  4. Alexis says:

    My heart is breaking for you Hevel. Stay safe

  5. Tara says:

    I respect you, but if the injuries are 700 to 70, it can’t hurt to think about the children (20+ Palestinian kids who have died) of Gaza who are innocent victims.

    • Hevel @KosherKola says:

      My heart aches for the children on both sides. The difference is, Israel protects the civillians while the Hamas use homes, hospitals, civillian neighbourhoods as their bases of operation. We are just simply better at protecting the 4.5 million civillians under fire from Gaza.

  6. Eszter says:

    That’s so awful. It’s enough to fear for your own life, but as parent it is…. 艕RJ脥T艕!!!! (the English word ‘mad’ is just not enough to me.) 馃檨 to hear these words or to fear for your kids.
    I wish it will stop soon!

  7. Shauna says:

    I am also concerned about your health. I don’t check your blog every day,or every week, butI try to keep up with all your entries. Cisplatin, sir, is something that needs a little explaining. It’s a cancer chemo treatment, no? What’s going on? Your recent heart surgery was bad enough. Am I missing something! Or do I live in an altered universe?

    I waited a while to see if any commenter mentioned or questioned it. Don!t see any. Maybe this is censored?


    • Hevel @KosherKola says:

      Hi Shauna! Yes, it is part of a chemothrapy protocol lovingly referred to as ESHAP. It’s something I generally don’t talk about on my blog, but definitely not censored… I just let the Cisplatin slip when I should have written something else. I think those who commented either already knew or didn’t pick it up.

  8. Shauna says:

    Well, having been through chemo, I know it’s no treat. And, sorry you have to go through it. I like your writing, and figured you would deal with things about it in writing some where, I just had not seen anything about it. Hope it works/helps. And, remember, wear those cool red pants often!

    I just painted the insides of my kitchen cupboards red and now everything inside them look s like jewels. Highly recommend.

    • Hevel @KosherKola says:

      I have an extremely hard time writing about cancer. Heck, this is the 4th time I start to write this reply to you! There are a lot of half written and deleted entries about my experience. But… I can’t.

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